Oct 1

Say it with me…

I have too much going on…

I have too many people relying on me…

I have far more important things to do…

I just won’t give anyone the satisfaction…

I refuse to allow anyone to have that much control over my thoughts and moods…

I am too good to stoop to your level…


Oct 1

When I post about my son, I get reblogged  and messaged by so many other people going through the exact same journey as Mason, but without any support whatsoever. 

If you are transgender, and lacking the encouragement of your parent or family while you under go this transition, please feel free to think of me as a possible substitution.

NO CHILD…and I mean that with my entire mother fucking heart….NO CHILD EVER ANYWHERE should ever feel like they aren’t good enough or deserving of a mother’s love.

My heart is big enough, my arms are wide enough….it’s yours if you want it.

 All of you…ANY OF YOU.

Oct 1
  1. I have applied for over 100 jobs in 36 hours. I am totally ready to just get this mother fucker started already.
  2. I am happy. Stressed, but happy. I feel like maybe something inside of me was blocked, and it got swept open and now the light filtering in is warming my bones.
  3. I refuse to let someone rent space in my head…have fun with me living in yours, though.
  4. My shin splints and sciatica are fucking with my running. I want to cry most nights and I find I am making excuses to avoid it altogether, but I have to be stronger than the part of my body that doesn’t care if I live or die. I have to run. Everyday.
  5. Music is my happy place. I don’t know if I could survive without it.
  6. I had a phone interview and we talked about Snark for 15 minutes and he didn’t make me feel like I wasted my time or like it was stupid. He was impressed and interested in hearing more about it.
  7. Chinese food tonight?
  8. I want to go to all the concerts. Everywhere. I think I’ll start with Maroon 5 in November…yes please.
  9. Honey nut cheerios with skim milk and a sprinkle of sugar is like mouth magic.
  10. I’m falling, Janice. 
Oct 1

It’s been a long time coming but today it became official.

My son, born Maria, is now legally Mason!!

The emotions I felt standing at the clerk’s window could never properly be put into words. The shame, the animosity he must have felt when showing someone his ID with his birth name, just all melted away at the tiny little window.

Now? I am  making him a cake.

A re-BIRTH day, if you will. 

Today, Mason Alexander became real and I just could not be happier for him.

Pinterest pepperoni pizza pasta…my house smells like heaven.

Pinterest pepperoni pizza pasta…my house smells like heaven.

This morning I was standing in a government office, worried I may have to apply for assistance to get medical insurance for my daughter and this afternoon I now have three interviews set up for this week.

I just had a phone interview where the manager said he was BLOWN AWAY by my cover letter.

Go figure.

Anyway….I’m doing this, you guys.

Watch me.

I went to the store to buy a $60 dollar microwave and left with my wallet $280 lighter.

And I didn’t even buy myself anything.

How does that even happen?

I was convinced I was having a heart attack all day because pushing my dad in a wheelchair and helping him get up and out of the chair several times over the course of the morning was the most intense workout I’ve had in months and literally every muscle in my body hurts like I got drop kicked and dragged behind a parade float.

I made dinner, fed everyone and myself and now I am taking my deliriously exhausted ass to bed.

Unless you want to send me dirty messages and stuff…?

Then, ya know…I’ll stay awake for that.

Sometimes, all it takes is someone reinforcing that you are doing everything in your power to better your life and that you are a mother fucking bad ass, to have you believing it wholeheartedly too. 

I need to remember that I am the captain of my own boat. No one can and should be able to control my joy. And that in the end, everything that happens to me, will happen because me and ME ALONE,  willed it to.


I feel better and stuff.